Bleh.

Everything sucks. I’m off my meds as of a week ago, and I have all these side effects that are making everything harder than it has to be. On top of  that, i have a ton of  half term tests coming up, as well as exams looming over me like an ever-present cloud of doom.(you might think I’m being a bit  over-dramatic, but I’m really not, trust me.)

All I want to do really is read and write. But everything I’ve written as of lately is rubbish and it’s really pissing me off.  And as far as reading goes I don’t have the conscious to read for pleasure when I have so much homework and school related things going on. Everything has just been so bleh lately that I’m going to let myself indulge in this word vomit post whether people like it or not. As a matter of fact, I’m not even going to read over and edit it !
fa2a5e6d6345a393758007dd325c319d.jpg

Life At An Agricultural Boarding School

I know that I’ve mentioned before that because of intricate reasons I am currently attending a boarding school which specializes in agriculture. And even though I might not have any personal interests in doing anything involving agriculture, I do recognize the importance of it and how pretty and idyllic the schools and its surrounding is.

on a normal day,I get up at 06:45 which gives me about an hour to do my makeup, brush my teeth, get dressed,eat breakfast and get to class.
At 14:40 mandatory lessons are done for the day and I head over to the cafeteria to eat dinner. after that I am basically free to do whatever I want. After dinner, I usually do whatever I need to do homework wise or I take a nap (cause apparently I have the energy level of a 90-year-old man…) And after that, I usually just hang out with people I share a ”dorm” with, or I stay in my room doing nothing in particular until 19:00 when it’s time for supper. After supper, everything is pretty chill and I just hang around…. Depending on how tired I am, I sometimes go for a walk on the school grounds or down to a little shop not far from the school.
And that’s it really, that’s what my day usually consists of. It’s not that exciting, but that’s how I want things to be like right now. I just want to focus on my school work and exams so I can get the OK to move and start studying what I really want to study…

Here are some photos I’ve taken while going for walks around the surrounding perimeter of the school.

 

The thing about Cassandra Clare’s books

with Norwegian being my  first language, there  was only a handful of ya books available for me in my language when I first started to read on a regular basis. So when I was fifteen, I decided to try to read an entire book in English. Obviously, it went well enough for me to keep on reading non-Norwegian books. One of the first books I read was Cassandra Clare’s City of Bones (The Mortal Instruments). I remember LOVING the book,the world and above all, the characters.It has since been made into a movie (which kinda flopped) and is currently airing as a TVshow (which is flopping so hard atm !) on Freeform.

Cassandra Clare has made three different storylines within the shadowhunter world, as of right now. I’ve read two of them, The Mortal Instruments series, which consists of six books set in modern day New York.tumblr_mm9b61t6v81r3oy4vo1_1280

And The infernal devices, a trilogy set in the victorian time in England.

Four-Shadowhunter-Series-Four-Seasons-mortal-instruments-34434470-1280-429

And now I’m debating whether or not to start reading the first book in her new series,it’s called lady Midnight and the story takes place after the last book of The mortal instruments series and it’s set in Los Angeles.
dd

The thing about reading Cassandra Clare’s books is that you don’t just read one of her books. whether you like it or not, you’re going to be extremely, and involuntary, emotionally involved in them. And with the universe being as big as it is at the moment, I’m having some serious trouble keeping up with everything. I feel like there is a bunch of short stories and blog posts I should have read.. So I’m finding it really hard to keep up with the general storyline. Don’t get me wrong I still love Cassie and the fact that she keeps expanding the universe, it’s more me that I am frustrated with, not her. please tell me I’m not the only one with this problem..?

Life lately: Cramming up

I honestly just want to write creative things for this blog and work on my story, but seeing as we’re approaching  the final months before school’s out , it’s not looking too good for me. the teachers at my school is in that manic state where they’ve finally realized we’re only a couple of months away from exams and they’re cramming in as many assignments and tests as possible in a week. Hence i dont have a lot of time to write for entertainment.

There’s so much that has happened to me this last month that i want to talk to you guys about, but as for right now, i need to focus on my school work. But hopefully, that doesnt mean that i wont try to write a cheeky little post every now and then. The thing i still do everynight though is writing in my journal so i might share something from that.

Anyway, I hope you’ve had a great easter/spring break wherever and whoever you are. I’m going back to school tomorrow since i live in a dorm, if i get there that is…. My car has been acting up lately and i thank the Gods everytime i put the keys in the ignition and the motor rumbles to life.
image

Pic of what my easter holiday have been consisting of

Storytime: somewhere between cynical and naive

Something tells me I’m not gonna post this once i finish writing it, or that I’m going to delete it just after posting it. cause, its mainly about my frustrations about another person and i dont want to use this platform as a place to bash other people.. But here goes nothing i guess.

Tonight i got a text from a friend who was feeling a bit down. And i  went to her house to try to cheer her up (as one does). We ended up going to go a local bar and agreed to not stay out too late considering i have this HUGE presentation next week that desperately needs some attention this weekend. We also agreed that i was going to be the designated driver for the evening,hence the strongest thing i was drinking was coffee.

One hour turned into two, then three, then four. And then the bar was closing, i thought that was our queue to start getting ready to go home, but no. Shortly after leaving the bar, i found myself third-wheeling my friend and a guy she met at the bar. i wanted to go home, she wanted to stay at his. i stayed for maybe a little over a hour before i’d had enough and announced i was going down to get the car.

By the way, did i mention this guy was a HUGE jerk ? Cause he was.. A major one.. He reminded me why i so desperately need to get away from this town ASAP. Every doubt I’ve had about whether or not i want to move to a different city, was extinguished within 30 minutes of meeting this fine gentleman

People in this town have this  amazing ability to make me feel so small, irrelevant, abnormal and at times even ugly. It makes me so angry and not to mention sad, that it makes it hard to even see straight sometimes.

Anyway, so yeah, i decided to leave. I told her to hurry up and say goodbye to him if she wanted  a ride home, cause i was tired and extremely ready to go to bed. 15 minutes later i got a text saying i could just leave without her, that  she would get home one way or another….

I was livid. Maybe i am overreacting,but  it’s just that, this is a person i look up to and admire a lot, so watching her demean herself, and act like a totally different person just to stroke some guy’s ego, really infuriates and saddens me.